Sorry this is late! Along with the rest of campus I have been sick for about a week and a half, while being slightly sedated by the codine cough syrup I was prescribed I wrote down both of my summaries as November instead of October. Thanks for your patience!
In the piece Markets, Marriages, and other Mates: The Problem of Power, the power struggle between husband and wife is studied. The focus is on how each marital role is valued and how the contribution of power within the relationship is based on the individuals ability to provide for the marriage financially. Historically the husband is expected to be the breadwinner of the family and the wife is expected to supply the domestic support. Both partners make investments in a marriage that are either general ( basic needs) or relationship specific (only benefit inside on the relationship).
The authors propose that women have a disadvantage when it comes to the power contribution of marriage. They tend to provide more relationship specific investments that only pay off if they stay in the marriage. Their investments are not as tangible as the working husband and cannot be redeemed outside of the marriage. The husband provides the basic needs of the family and therefore has more bargaining power with the marriage because he could survive outside of it. The only way for a homemaker to cash in on her marital investments and training if the marriage fails is to remarry. Without the husband they would not be able to meet the basic needs for themselves and their family, giving women less bargaining power in the relationship. Women also learn culturally to be more selfless than men and tend to not push the bargaining stage as far as men.
In the last fifty years women have been entering the workforce by storm, not needed to depend on a husband as much as in the past. This article links the increase in divorce rates with the increase in female employment. Women have gained more power in the relationship but the domestic duties also still fall on the wife. Wives are more likely to exit a relationship when they are unhappy then in the past because of their ability to provide basic needs for themselves .
I do agree that women have a disadvantage in the power struggle of marriage based on cultural beliefs. In western society women are expected to be more subordinate and passive than men, and are often given negative responses if they come off “too masculine”. The study mentioned that this may be linked historically to women being better slaves then men but I feel in western society it is linked more to religion. Many religions view women as being inferior to men based on religious teachings such as Adam and Eve. Marriage between a man and woman is not only a civic union but a religious one for the majority of people. Therefore giving the wife even more pressure to naturally be a good mother and wife.
I also agree with the notion that female employment has increased the divorce rate in recent years. Women have much greater opportunities than in the past, even though they are unequal to men. I feel that this fact has changed the purpose and dynamic of marriage. Marriage was almost key to survival for most women in the past and now that they can function as an independent unit, marriage is not as necessary. This gives women a greater opportunity to leave a marriage if they are unhappy. I feel that this has affected what we look for in a partner, instead of each person looking for a “business partner”, the idea of marriage has been romanticized. Men and women are not just looking for someone to support them financially or provided domestic duties anymore, they are looking for a true compatibility and honest connection. Because women can now offer more, they are expecting more of their own needs to be met.
Overall I feel the traditional roles and values of marriage are outdated. Historically if began as a business transaction where each person had a specific duty to fulfill. Now that both partners are able to provide the same contributions that value of marriage has shifted to how well the other person fulfills emotional and supportive roles. With this being said I also believe that your upbringing and cultural identity contributes a lot to your role in a marriage. You are more likely to be content in specific role if that is all you have ever known.
I feel this is why I have a more egalitarian expectation of marriage, rather than the power being proportioned unequally. I grew up with my father being a single parent of myself and my three brothers. Being self -dependent was a major value in my family. I feel that this gave me an advantage in life and relationships. I was taught to hunt, rebuild a car motor, and expected to contribute to manual labor chores right along side my brothers. On the other hand my brothers and I were expected to contribute to household chores equally. Because of these values I feel that If I decide to get married, It would have to be with someone that holds similar values and embraces joint participation in every aspect of the relationship.
Monday, October 26, 2009
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I agree with a lot of the things she was talking about. Marriage has changed so much. Women actually enjoy going out and getting a job while also taking care of their kids. Man years ago would not have been okay with that but it’s hard to find a woman now that is okay with only staying home. This is why female employment has increased divorce rate because women are stronger willed now than they were in the past. Women don’t need to marry a man just so he can support her. But women can support themselves now. I also agree with that women have a disadvantage in the power struggle or marriage. This is because the way we are raised to think that men are suppose to do all the dirty work and bring in the money. That is how our world sees it as the man on top and the women on the bottom. No matter how hard the woman tries she will never be as good as the man. But then if she tries really hard she is told she being to "manly". Even though women are becoming stronger and most colleges have more female students then male students, women will never be able to earn the same respect as men.
ReplyDeleteFirst, I would like to state that, unfortunately, most points from this article are how many individuals do view marriages and relationships for that matter. Moreover, I agree with the points that were brought forth by Kerri. Marriages nowadays seem as though they are all about power. For instance, there is a constant struggle over who will do anything from taking out the garbage to purchasing a new vehicle. As for women not having any concrete attributions to the marriage, I believe this is a load of donkey poop. First, women today are contributing to the marriage by providing a second income in most cases. Second, if women were only at home taking care of items such as cleaning, cooking, and paying the bills it is still needed in the marriage. What if the woman was not there to do these items? The men would then have to do it. Obviously, what women are doing is a contribution to the marriage and should not be overlooked.
ReplyDeleteMarriage is somewhat taken for granted in today’s life because if it ends in a divorce, you can go out and find someone new to marry and satisfy your “needs.” This is truly devastating to the institute that marriage is supposed to represent. There should not even be a power struggle in marriage. Men should not be viewed as any more superior to women. The work should be divided equally among both partners and should not be based on gender. This is where the problems tend to stem from. We grow up with gender stereotypes that are embedded into us and we do not steer away from them; instead, we keep making them more radical and diverse.
I am just going to stop while I am ahead because I could go on about this article for a long time. This article was hard to read because honestly, it pisses me off. Do not get me wrong though, it was interesting. Yes, I may be a woman and play more towards our side, but for Pete’s sake make the world an equal place to live in. This is the land of “equal” opportunities right?
I thought that England and Kilbourne’s writing on markets and marriages was one of the most interesting topics yet. I agree with professor Rudy that the true issue lies under the idea that power between the gender roles is directly connected with the changing of roles over the years. The two prime roles are that men are considered “the shopper” and/or buyer and women have the role as being “the seller” and/or the commodity. In the 1950’s men held the power, status, and resources. Where women on the other hand didn’t have direct access to these privileges unless they went to college (which at the time was a more masculine role). Much has changed thanks to the feminist movement. The male role is starting to be played by more women these days. The roles are starting to change and shift not by a buyer and seller relationship but more change is coming about from a more shared role between men and women. However, this sometimes causes confusion between relationships and who does what and how to “fallow suit”. There are still men out there who don’t want to give up control and they want everything done in their terms and not the woman’s. Its almost as if these relationships are in a limbo because of unfamiliar social codes. For example, when a couple goes on dates at the beginning of a relationship, which pays the check? Do they slit it down the middle? It is clear that the power dynamic varies from person to person, to selectively decide or if effort derivative if appreciated or not. In my opinion it is a very controversial issue between the sexes and there is no clear-cut answer or solution. However, I do believe that the bottom line resides that it is all about power.
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